A big loser
Mississippi is the fattest state, you know. It's no wonder, what with all the fried stuff and complete and total lack of nutritional education. For years I thought I was doing my body a favor by eating lots and lots of potatoes. Hey, I was eating my vegetables. And butter is in the dairy group, right? Every meat my mother cooked was served on a layer of paper towels. Stop judging me and pass the salt.
My new diet is still going strong. It's been about three weeks, I guess. I lost track. Speaking of LOSING, I've lost somewhere between 5 and 8 pounds. There are about 2 pounds that seem to come and go as they please regardless of what I do, so I'm not sure of the exact amount that's actually come off my fat ass, but I know I'm making progress. Slow, slow progress. Little kids still make beeping sounds when I back up in Wal Mart, and probably will for months and months, but I'll just be happy with my 5 to 8 pounds of progress for now. Sometimes I feel hungry, but most afternoons I realize I haven't eaten much of anything and decide I've got to eat something. I think it's getting easier. We ate at a restaurant yesterday, but stayed completely loyal to our plan. Still, we won't do that more than once a month or so.
TH hasn't weighed himself, but he seems to have lost weight too. His face looks a little more slim to me. He denies it, but I say he's getting more kissable by the day.
Today I had a meeting after work, and was supremely disappointed when I couldn't use my laptop. I had it up and running and ready to go, and it turned out that I didn't need it. I had to shut it down and pick up a pen and paper. The other teachers laughed at me because I was so eager to use it, and the only thing it came in handy for was checking the time because the clock in the classroom had died. Eight hundred dollar clock.
I can't wait until the next time we have to spend the day in the library or someone else's classroom and I get to break it out and be super productive while everyone else falls behind. Muwahahahahahahahah!
Today I did a makeup day with my first and second period class. The others took a 9 weeks test. The makeup classes were exhausting, and tomorrow I've got four of them. I'm tired to the point of delirium, but there are pork chops in the oven and I'd prefer not to burn the house down.
Tune in tomorrow night for a thrilling post about my beloved green ink pen.
My new diet is still going strong. It's been about three weeks, I guess. I lost track. Speaking of LOSING, I've lost somewhere between 5 and 8 pounds. There are about 2 pounds that seem to come and go as they please regardless of what I do, so I'm not sure of the exact amount that's actually come off my fat ass, but I know I'm making progress. Slow, slow progress. Little kids still make beeping sounds when I back up in Wal Mart, and probably will for months and months, but I'll just be happy with my 5 to 8 pounds of progress for now. Sometimes I feel hungry, but most afternoons I realize I haven't eaten much of anything and decide I've got to eat something. I think it's getting easier. We ate at a restaurant yesterday, but stayed completely loyal to our plan. Still, we won't do that more than once a month or so.
TH hasn't weighed himself, but he seems to have lost weight too. His face looks a little more slim to me. He denies it, but I say he's getting more kissable by the day.
Today I had a meeting after work, and was supremely disappointed when I couldn't use my laptop. I had it up and running and ready to go, and it turned out that I didn't need it. I had to shut it down and pick up a pen and paper. The other teachers laughed at me because I was so eager to use it, and the only thing it came in handy for was checking the time because the clock in the classroom had died. Eight hundred dollar clock.
I can't wait until the next time we have to spend the day in the library or someone else's classroom and I get to break it out and be super productive while everyone else falls behind. Muwahahahahahahahah!
Today I did a makeup day with my first and second period class. The others took a 9 weeks test. The makeup classes were exhausting, and tomorrow I've got four of them. I'm tired to the point of delirium, but there are pork chops in the oven and I'd prefer not to burn the house down.
Tune in tomorrow night for a thrilling post about my beloved green ink pen.
Labels: diary of a fat ass
Well, I've always heard it is better to lose weight slowly. One of these days, I may even try to prove it. MY personal addiction is Mountain Dew. Every year I tell myself I'm quitting them, and every year, I drink Diet Rites for a couple of weeks, then gradually start slipping a MD here and there until, lo and behold, I'm drinking nothing else. I don't do coffee and I don't do tea, so MD is really my drug of choice. There is just nothing better than one that's so cold it's practically icy.
And don't hand me one of those DIET Mountain Dews, either. Blegh... If it's not the real thing, I'd just as soon have a Diet Rite.
Now I'm thirsty.
Posted by
Anonymous |
10:08 PM
Please, please tell me that nothing bad happened to your beloved green ink pen when you were gone that day and the not-substitute messed with your computer settings. I will be absent Friday, and I already laid out the free pen the insurance company gave us, and a pink-and-white monstrosity that no self-respecting person who is not a 12-year-old girl would dare to swipe. My GOOD pens are stashed away in the back of my deep, deep top drawer, behind the old boxes of staples. I must protect the tools of my trade. I don't understand those freaks who say, "Eh. It's JUST a pen."
Posted by
Hillbilly Mom |
10:41 PM
If anyone tells you "Eh it's just a pen," wait until they start writing something, then snatch it out of their hands. Then look all surprised, and say "would you look at that! It sure got important now that it's your pen, didn't it."
Posted by
Stewed Hamm |
1:37 AM
I had TWO big fat pens that I loved to use at work. Whenever I'd be off, I'd hide them in the back of my drawer, so nobody who might wander into my office for any purpose, nefarious or otherwise, would be able to steal them.
Alas, the second of the two finally sputtered and died this week. Now, I've got to use some skinny little Bic pen instead. There's one other big fat pen like it up front at the office, but it is clearly marked with the words "This pen was stolen from Iron's Body Shop", so I know that I wouldn't be able to get away with stealing it again.
Unless I hide it in my purse and just used it AWAY from the office.............
Muwahwahwahwah..................
Posted by
Anonymous |
1:05 PM