DeadpanAnn (old blogger version)

Not much to tell at the moment, but that won't stop me from talking. Err typing.

TH was off work today. He mowed the lawn while I went to do the grocery shopping. I also stopped at the teacher supply store, thinking perhaps I could be a better teacher if I just had more stuff. Maybe there was some magical item there that would help me. Yesterday during one of my makeup classes, the kids got so loud at one point that all three adjoining teachers stuck their heads in to see what was wrong. I had to send five of them out. The students, not the teachers. It was an embarrassing event and I've been thinking about it all day today.

Sometimes things just fall apart. That's what I get for planning a day with very little structure. I was trying to help the little brats. A lot of my kids have failing grades, and it's mostly because they've got missing assignments. To spare myself the trouble of doing the paperwork required when you fail someone make sure no deserving child was left behind, I decided to give them a makeup day. I looked up everyone's grades to see what they needed, and I printed out the assignments or acceptable substitute assignments and laid them out in a nice line on a table. I also wrote the titles of the assignments on the board. When the kids got there, I went through each assignment and called out the names of the kids who needed to do it. I told them to turn each thing in at the makeup basket when they were finished, and to go on to the next assignment. While they were doing this, I was trying to get some grades entered into the computer so I could give them a more realistic idea of their current averages.

Could they follow those directions? No.

Could they stay on task without me hovering over them? No.

My desk was constantly surrounded by kids asking what they needed to do next, or shoving their completed assignments in my face even though I'd said FIFTY FCKING TIMES to turn it in to the makeup basket on the counter. The ones who weren't up in my face were in their seats talking. I repeatedly had to ask them to quiet down and get back to work, but the longer the class went on, the more chaotic it got. At one point, about six kids got up, and I shouted, "SIT DOWN AND STOP TALKING NNOOWWW!" Then everyone freaks out that the teacher has lost her cool, and acts like I'm the wicked witch of the South for raising my voice at them, like I'm supposed to act like Barney all the damn time regardless of what they do. Pisses me the fk off.

I will never give them another makeup day. Ever.

It might not have been as bad as it was, but the whole day was crazy for everyone because it was free dress day. Normally they wear uniforms, but we're having our United Way campaign right now, so the kids could wear blue jeans and t-shirts if they donated $3. Almost all of them did. It provided a beautiful example of what uniforms are good for. As one kid said during first period, "It doesn't even feel like a school day today!" And they didn't act like it was one either. If we have another free dress day, I might call in sick.

Anyway, maybe the chaos of fifth period wasn't 100% my fault, but I still feel bad for losing my cool with them.

Sometimes it's like I just can't win. They don't listen and they don't do their work, so they end up with zeros and low test scores, which translate to F's. But if I give them the F they earned, *I* have to do a ton of paperwork to show that I did this and that intervention to help the child succeed. So I go against everything I believe in about teaching personal responsibility, and give them the chance to basically undo the damage they've done over the last nine weeks, and what do they do? They spend the whole time doing the same shit they've been doing for nine weeks-- fking off.

It's a little difficult to NOT get pissed off when you find yourself being worked to death to help people who truly don't give a rat's ass anyway.

Anyway, I guess I needed to get that off my chest.

In other news, I think I have athlete's foot. JOY.

After I got back from trying to purchase a solution to my problems, TH and I went to Lowe's to buy some plywood so he could temporarily fix the exterior door to the shop, which Sweet Tea destroyed so long ago. We can't find a suitable replacement, so we're just rigging it for now. I also bought some shower board, because I heard that you can write on it w/ dry erase marker. Some education guru told us about it in a workshop a long time ago. You have it cut into squares and let your kids use them. They like doing anything different, so they can do their bell ringer sentences on whiteboard at their desks instead of on paper, or they can write down their answers and hold them up when we're reviewing, or whatever. I couldn't find anyone there to cut it for me, but TH says he can cut it but it just might not be cut into perfect squares. If I don't stay on him about it, it might not be cut into anything at all.