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Thursday, January 29, 2009 

Doctors. They're assholes.

Yesterday I met a psychic pediatrician. He knew what Charlie had before he ever saw him! When he walked into the room, he already had an information sheet on the common cold in his hand. At least he did check Charlie's ears before he handed it to me, but he'd definitely already decided that it wasn't an ear infection before he looked. He said that just because he's pulling his ear that doesn't mean it's his ear that's hurting him, because a baby his age can't localize pain very well. He had something, though, because his temp got up to 100.2 and stayed around 100 for a couple of days, so he decided it was a cold and told me to come back if his temperature got up to 101 or if he seemed to get much worse.

Before leaving the room, he thought it was necessary to explain to me why the common cold didn't require antibiotics. I didn't ask for antibiotics. I didn't mention antibiotics. I didn't ask for any medications at all. I understand the difference between a virus and an infection. Do I just look slow, or do doctors enjoy insulting people's intelligence? He is not Charlie's regular doctor. If he was, he would've STOPPED being his doctor after that.

Charlie doesn't have a cold. He's had no cold symptoms. I think he might be working on a tooth. Whatever. It really doesn't matter to me what he has or had as long as he's okay, and he is.

I'm just pissed that I had to pay $78 for that bullsheet.

Still, it's good that you took Charlie to see The Asshole. With the fever and ear-pulling and rash, you never know when it could be a case of strep developing. Both my kids had it as young 'uns, and I didn't take them to the doctor until the rash. The fever goes higher with strep, though.

Since I know how much you value my comments, here's a nice long one for you. ;)

A tale of the Assholes:
When The Pony was sick during November, HH took him to his regular doctor. The doctor was booked up, so HH agreed to the nurse practitioner. She gave The Pony some cough medicine and an antibiotic, because she said his throat was red, and it might be a developing case of strep. According to The Pony, HH didn't want her to give the strep test, just the medicine. HH paid the normal $20 copay.

Two weeks ago, we got a bill from the Asshole's office saying that we owed another $20. The bill showed 1) the original copay, 2) what the insurance paid, 3) the negotiated amount that the Asshole's office ate because of their contract with the insurance company, and 4) a mysterious $20 that was left over. Oh, and just so you can see how much better we have it here in Missouri, the office visit was $138.

After HH called the office, where they refuse to answer the phone and all you can get is a voice mail, and the idiot calling MY cell (which has to be turned off during school hours) and leaving ME a message, and HH calling and leaving a new message the next day...the Asshole's business manager called back and said that HH's insurance must have changed and now requires a $40 copay, and he should deal with the insurance or pay the Asshole the $20.

The Asshole's office mailed out this bill on December 30, for the appointment that was in November. HH's insurance sent out a new card effective Jan. 1. But NOTHING changed. What HH found out from insurance was that the doctor's office had coded the visit as a SPECIALIST, for which we have a $40 copay. Get that! A nurse practitioner is a SPECIALIST!

And to put my panties in an even bigger wad, the insurance said they would send the Asshole that other $20.

So, for their fraud, the Asshole's office ended up $20 richer. That pisses me off as much as if it was MY $20.

For the record, The Pony was much better within two days of that office visit, so I figure he really needed that antibiotic.

All doctors think we mere mortals are stupid. When my girl child was little, I took her to see the pediatrician. He was discussing eating and nutrition, etc. and said something about when she "masticates." I guess he thought I might think she was doing a little baby self-exploration, because he stopped mid-sentence, looked at me and said "you know, chews her food." I wanted to say "Yes, asshole, I KNOW the difference between masturbate and masticate" but thought "why bother?"

I am sorry this Dr. was such a jerk. I had an idiot once too... I was relating the story to my mom when she reminded me that 1/2 the Dr.'s graduated in the LOWER half of the class and not to let him bother me.

Damnyankee - sounds like your Dr. was a pompous ass - who the hell says, "masticates?"

HM, That's what they do. Try to rob people and see who lets them. If you're not paying attention or don't have the time/energy to fight it, they succeed.

DY, I'm gonna agree with Julie-- why the hell did he say MASTICATE??? Sounds like he was fresh out of med school and eager to impress someone with his new vocabulary.

He WAS a relatively new doctor at the time, plus he was the only pediatrician in our little borough, so I guess he thought he was special. He didn't stay long, so maybe he pissed off one too many of the local mamas. I remember another young mother decided to take her child, who had been his patient, to another pediatrician in Meridian for a second opinion, and he chewed her out, told her he'd NEVER treat one of her children again.

He died of cancer at a relatively young age, so I maybe there's a lesson in there somewhere.

I thought I already posted this comment but I guess not...

I just got one of those "explanation of benefits" forms in the mail from my ins. co. According to them, they were billed more than $550 for Charlie's first round of vaccinations. The office visit charge alone was $147.

Ridiculous.

We're paying for all the folks who don't pay.

When you go to the rural health clinic and have to pay $150 cash because you have a job while the lady in front of you pays $2, that has to do with people not paying. But when you go to a private doc I think it has more to do w/ malpractice insurance. Who knows.

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