The Sperm Embargo
First of all, let me just say that I can't believe I'm blogging about this.
Tim thinks the name Angus Malcolm is the coolest name he's ever heard for a kid. I gagged when I heard it. Okay, so I didn't gag when I heard the name-- I gagged when I realized he got it from the lead and rhythm guitarists of AC/DC. Wouldn't that be like child abuse-- to name your kid after members of AC/DC?? I mean, why don't we just name him White Trash McTimslastname and slap a rebel flag shirt on him and be done with it?
Angus is not that bad, except that it will doom a kid to certain playground torture. Malcolm is not bad at all. So I say if it must be-- MUST BE those two names, switch the order and make the hamburger sounding one the middle name. That's nonsense, says he, because Angus is the lead guitarist.
He also said he thinks he should be the one to name our kid (yes, our kid who hasn't been conceived yet and may never be) and wants me to surrender my rights and let him do it. I think that's a two person job in the first place, but after hearing Angus Malcolm McTimslastname, I couldn't agree, and I told him so.
If I surrender my naming rights, we might end up with a Fighter Pilot Rambo McTimslastname. And God forbid we should have a girl...
Anyway, Tim declared a sperm embargo until I agree that Angus Malcolm rocks.
I think I'll go have a third cup of coffee.
Tim thinks the name Angus Malcolm is the coolest name he's ever heard for a kid. I gagged when I heard it. Okay, so I didn't gag when I heard the name-- I gagged when I realized he got it from the lead and rhythm guitarists of AC/DC. Wouldn't that be like child abuse-- to name your kid after members of AC/DC?? I mean, why don't we just name him White Trash McTimslastname and slap a rebel flag shirt on him and be done with it?
Angus is not that bad, except that it will doom a kid to certain playground torture. Malcolm is not bad at all. So I say if it must be-- MUST BE those two names, switch the order and make the hamburger sounding one the middle name. That's nonsense, says he, because Angus is the lead guitarist.
He also said he thinks he should be the one to name our kid (yes, our kid who hasn't been conceived yet and may never be) and wants me to surrender my rights and let him do it. I think that's a two person job in the first place, but after hearing Angus Malcolm McTimslastname, I couldn't agree, and I told him so.
If I surrender my naming rights, we might end up with a Fighter Pilot Rambo McTimslastname. And God forbid we should have a girl...
Anyway, Tim declared a sperm embargo until I agree that Angus Malcolm rocks.
I think I'll go have a third cup of coffee.
Labels: married life
I have a relative that named a little girl Trinity Lucille, so, whatever you do, DON'T give up your rights! I also have a co-worker that named her daughter Sparkle Kenita. I often wonder if parents ever think about what it would be like to be an old woman named Sparkle, or Trinity - or a old man named Angus Malcolm!
Posted by
Anonymous |
6:44 AM
Mr. C & I went through all this when we were choosing names for the upcoming Munchkin. I was all set on Savannah for a girl, but he threw a fit. "It sounds like a porno name!"
So just tell Tim that, if he insists on this name, he needs to be aware that the playground nickname of this kid will be "Anus" if he's LUCKY. And Tim had better go ahead & start a savings account for that kid's therapy.
Posted by
Anonymous |
6:57 AM
Unless you two plan on moving to California, then I'm afraid that Angus Malcolm should be crossed off your list. Even if it is pretty cool.
On the other hand, if you do plan to live in CA, where celebrities name their kids "Pilot Inspector" and "Apple," then Angus won't have to worry about playground abuse at all, what with all those other easy targets.
Word Verification: mgysmxti - Yet another name that will have to be crossed off your list.
Posted by
Stewed Hamm |
10:29 AM
I have to take issue with Tim's logic (and you can qwuote me on this).
While Angus is indeed the lead guitarist, that rightaway puts him in the second name category because Malcolm is playing ALL OF THE TIME. Yes (answering the heated comeback) I do know that Angus is playing rhythm guitar when he is not playing lead, but it is not the same type of rhythm guitar playing. Malcolm's job is to supply the foundation along with drums and bass, while Angus gets to showboat and get all the fame.
Yes - I admit I am the rhythm guitarist as well - although I have always tried to maintain a more Townshend-like approach to filling the songs.
I think Malcolm Angus McTimslastname is an excellent choice, although if it were me, I would choose Malcolm McDowall McTimslastname, because I doubt anyone in his grade school has ever seen "Caligula" or "Clockwork Orange".
Posted by
Mr Bates |
10:42 AM
Compared with some of my husband's choices in names (Vlad, for example...you know, like Vlad, The Impaler, the inspiration for Stoker's Dracula?), Angus is sounding pretty good. Tell Tim that when he starts growing babies in his womb, then he can have a say in the name.
Posted by
Beth |
11:52 AM
You know there is a movie about a kid named Angus who gets picked on, right?
Posted by
Marshamarshamarsha |
2:17 PM
DamnYank-- Oh, I won't give up my rights.
Christi-- I agree that Anus is a likely nickname. Tim also thinks that every girl name sounds like a porn star or a stripper. He also says that "Rachel" sounds too much like "roach." I love the name Rachel.
Hamm and Bates, THANK YOU!
Boleyn-- God. Vlad's just awful. I'll remember to remind him that *I* will have to push the munchkin out of my cha-cha-kitty.
Marsha-- YES, I know! Tim identifies with the character. Smart, chubby, good-hearted, misunderstood. :sigh:
Posted by
Mommy Needs a Xanax |
5:08 PM